So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
time to smoke my breakfast
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize