If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
