Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I currently don't understand fingers.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
