have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Drunk is not a location!
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
