Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Everything about him screamed your future.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
