Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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