dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Enjoy the penises
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize