Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
as a side note pls kill me
Randomize
