:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
