Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Randomize
