Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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