I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize