He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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