im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
