i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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