When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
