i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I party with great urgency now.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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