Me too!
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Randomize
