I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize