Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
