dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
