Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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