its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize