This girl is more easily done than said...
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
