playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
