There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Randomize
