My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I would ride that face into the sunset
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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