Dual....:-)
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
