Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
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