i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
