you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
