found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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