from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
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