I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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