I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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