I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize