Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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