life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Randomize
