when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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