just tell him i said nine months
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Everything about him screamed your future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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