Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
i've created a new STD.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
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