My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
