Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
then he tried to convert me to islam
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I'm getting married
To pizza
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
He's on the porch naked. Help.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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