I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Randomize