After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
