I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
