man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
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Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
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She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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