why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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