Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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