some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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