You really coming over, don't trick.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
